introducing the venus/no-penis music prize

In its chequered eighteen-year history the Mercury Prize has repeatedly come under fire for being too populist, too major-label focused, too male, too unrepresentative of what’s really going on in British music, and in recent years a few alternative lists have been cropping up among various UK music websites. Drowned In Sound have their Neptune Prize, now in its third year, while The Line Of Best Fit have their all-new Uranus Prize.

In keeping with the planetary theme, the obvious choice for a Wears The Trousers shortlist was good old Venus, what with all women allegedly being beamed from the arid second rock from the Sun. “I’m a little dyslexic and Venus Prize reads as Penis Prize to me!! Eeeek!” protested one of our dear readers, and so the Venus/No-Penis Music Prize* was born. Time to have a bit of fun.

We’ve selected a dozen of our favourite female-fronted British albums released between July 1, 2009 and June 30, 2010, and reviewed by us with a rating of at least 8/10. Otherwise eligible albums already in contention for this year’s Mercury Prize were excluded (hard luck Laura Marling, Corinne Bailey Rae and bookies’ favourites The xx).

The winner, chosen by YOU, will be announced on September 7. It’s the same day as the Mercury Prize is awarded, but alas the Trousers piggybank won’t stretch to match their £20,000 prize. Instead we’ll donate a whopping fifty quid to a charity of the winner’s choice.

Exert your influence below!

* * *

Spooky debut album from Gruff Rhys protégée.

What we said: “From the opening title track in, it’s the voice that really stops you in your tracks, measured and restrained but bursting with character. Le Bon really shines as a guitarist too, shifting from the delicate melodic folk of ‘Sad Sad Feet’ to the White Stripes-esque rock of ‘Terror Of The Man’, taking care to visit every step in between. Like her singing, her playing is never self indulgent and sounds just as assured as her voice, allowing the songs enough room to shine and reveal themselves more with each listen.” [October 2009; 10/10]

Watch: ‘Shoeing The Bones’

Eccentric pop stylings from vibrant West Country native.

What we said: “We’re All In This Together never stays still, moving from wild honky-tonk cavorts to whispered wanderings and back again, bringing in an orchestra of accordions, kettle drums and a double bass. When their guard is let down – most notably in the title track – we’re treated to something both beautiful and fragile. Look past the carnivalesque and We’re All In This Together dazzles with truth beneath the greasepaint.” [November 2009; 8/10]

Watch: ‘We’re All In This Together’

Sophisticatedly ramshackle second album from a formidable talent.

What we said: “Ray has crafted rich, layered numbers that utilise everything from electric, acoustic and slide guitar to toy pianos and stylophones, even listing a filing cabinet in the “who done what” song credits [...] This is a fantastically singular work which sees Ray balancing a witty, dangerous pop aesthetic with dark, pulp-fiction humour.” [September 2009; 8/10]

Watch: ‘Fist Of A Flower’

Slippery fourth album from one-time jazz-folk songstress.

What we said: “Four albums into her career, she’s dispensed with filler entirely, stocking up instead on surprisingly varied, clean and sharp songwriting [...] If you’re seeking astoundment through accessible innovation, look no further than this impressive collection. Don’t believe the title: everything here is alive, red blooded and breathtaking.” [July 2009; 9/10]

Watch: ‘So Worn Out’ (live)

Videogame-inspired debut from dubstep frontrunner.

What we said: “What really astounds are the swooping, almost cinematic emotives that grace most of the tracks, threading in and building up to unexpected, subtly grand bridges [...] Ikonika cuts across the dubstep stratosphere with this album, creating a compelling, mind-bending masterpiece.” [April 2010; 9/10]

Watch: ‘Please’

Refreshingly compelling debut from witch-metal trio.

What we said: “Lead vocalist Chan Brown tears through The Master Alchemist’s supercharged arrangements with high-decibel prowess, sounding like Skunk Anansie’s Skin at a gospel choir covering Iron Maiden. Their frenetic, atmospheric structures come from Marek Stevens’s surprisingly frugal three-stringed guitar, amped up to the nines with thick, heavy distortion, while Zel Kaute drives everything to demon speed with thundering, doom-laden percussion.” [October 2009; 8/10]

Watch: ‘Spells Of Deception’

Fifth and most ambitious album from often overlooked Liverpudlian.

What we said: “This is music that reaches into the depths of those willing to give it the time and attention it needs. And that is perhaps the crux of this; The Fallen By Watch Bird has to be taken as a whole. While a couple of tracks on the album can be taken as coherent in themselves, it really is a piece of music that needs listening to intently from start to finish. At times quite moving in ways which are hard to fathom, it’s a quiet masterpiece of intriguing imagination.” [June 2010; 9/10]

Watch: ‘Hud A Llefrith’

Surprisingly sinister seventh album from established folkie.

What we said: “Despite its quickly-recorded ethos and minimal-take approach, The Quickening is remarkably well executed and impresses as a strong, well-written piece of work, the blossoming of a cumulative effect of years of touring and recording. Williams sounds confident and at ease here, so much so that she can afford to experiment with some less obvious sounds and styles. It’s a satisfying listen and, in short, something of a triumph.” [February 2010; 8/10]

Watch: ‘Just A Feeling’

The best kind of sensual adventure.

What we said: ”Wrought Iron is an album of passing scenes, whispered discretions and atmospheric change sweeping across big horizons. And in the middle of it all, connecting the earthly with the intimate is [Nancy Elizabeth] herself […] As lyrically introspective as she is at her most solitary and unguarded, she leaves no room for indulgence; the lasting impression is of a talent who appreciates the need for solid foundations beneath the ornamentation.” [October 2009; 10/10]

Watch: ‘Feet Of Courage’

An organic, purposeful debut from lovable Brighton trio.

What we said: “The subject matter is uniformly melancholy but it’s transfigured by the music into something raw and fiery [...] It’s honest and rarely overwrought, full of righteous anger and a depth of meaning, the rough edges only serving to endear it all the more. It speaks to breaking hearts but promises to mend them as well; there is hope amid the sadness and the rage.” [April 2010; 8/10]

Watch: ‘Watchman’

A whirlwind of elegant arrangements and dizzying fun.

What we said: “Divided leaves no room for doubt that Turnnidge is a gifted songwriter with an ear for traditional, high-art pop that she tweaks and customises into something delectably her own [...] The perfect balance of sunshine sounds and somewhat bitter lyrics keep her vacillating numbers from growing too quaint, adding a shock of realism to a very sweet-sounding album. A strong debut from a determined, versatile young songstress.” [August 2009; 8/10]

Watch: ‘The Rivals’

Spiky and playfully creepy, but with moments of sweetness.

What we said: “Wetdog do delicate and abrasive with equal skill, and match up-tempo indie rhythms with more sludgy, alt timing. ‘Tidy Up Your Bedroom’ shrieks with psychobilly surf, crashing with spiky, B-movie horror staccato guitar and spoof organs, while the choppy, almost Britpop beats that introduce ‘That Man Delivers Papers’ skid into the sludgy, discordant pluckings of Primus-type noise with a dirty-kneed glee.” [November 2009; 9/10]

Watch: ‘Lower Leg’

* with apologies to six-sevenths of Gabby’s Other Animals, Marek of Invasion and Peggy Sue’s delectable Olly.

Written by: Alan Pedder

Tags: cate le bon, gabby young and other animals, gemma ray, gwyneth herbert, ikonika, invasion, jane weaver, kathryn williams, nancy elizabeth, peggy sue, theoretical girl, wetdog

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